Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Diabetes In Fantasy Land

Kim, over at Textingmypancreas wrote an absolutely awesome post yesterday day called: Backlight: A Parody . It was brilliant! Kim really got me thinking about what if some of my favorite super heroes, storybook, & movie characters had diabetes. And the following post is what I came up with! Kim,thank you so much for being 100 % the inspiration for this post!!


Is there such a thing as diabetes in the wizarding world of Harry Potter? And if so, would WWDs (Wizards with diabetes) use their wands instead of needles, pumps, and glucose meters? Or would they cast some sort of insulin producing spell?

Would Batman wear his insulin pump on his utility belt and if he did, how the hell would be get the tubing through that Mylar rubber suit?

I guess he'd wear the omnipod.

But what if Bat Man ran out of pump batteries while having face-off with the Joker?

He is Bat Man, so I think he'd have his utility belt all tricked out with batteries and a remote control backup system.And let's face it, you know that his bad ass butler Alfred wouldn't allow for faulty mechanics to happen on his watch

If SnowWhite had the betes, would she have turned down the poison apple because her numbers were high and she couldn't eat any carbs at the time the wicked witch came a knocking at her door??

Would Santa Clause be considered a type 1 or type 2?

Could Wonder Woman use her Lasso of Truth to test her blood sugar? THINK ABOUT IT GUYS. I mean it is the Lasso of Truth after all - And we all know she's more Diazon than Glamazon!

I seriously have a feeling it could be the most accurate form of glucose testing, ever! And where the hell could she wear her Dexcom anyway? Seriously, that costume is REALLY SKIMPY. OK, I guess she could clip on her boot.

And since were talking about Wonder Woman, does her invisible plane have a refrigerator to store her insulin?

And what about a bathroom? I mean if she was flying while high, she'd have to put the invisible plan on auto pilot and head for the bathroom. I don't care how many feet up in the air she is, girlfriend needs privacy!

Would Homer Simpson be on insulin, metformin, symlin, or a diabetes trifecta involving all three?

If Jack Sparrow's blood sugar was on a downward trend, would he act more normal, or would continue acting like Keith Richards?? THINK ABOUT IT.

If Buddy the Elf had diabetes, How much would he have to bolus on a daily basis? Seriously, the dude mainlines maple syrup!!

If Sleeping Beauty had diabetes:

  1. She’d need ginourmous pump with a never ending battery and some type of new, super, indestructible, short acting insulin that refused to get all skunkadelic
  2. What would she do about the insulin dawn phenomena

If the Cowardly Lion had diabetes, would he wish for a working pancreas instead of courage?

Magic eight ball says "most likely" because let's face it, if the Cowardly Lion Had diabetes, he'd already be brave AND have boatloads of courage.

If Tinkberbell had diabetes, how much insulin would she require? I'm thinking like ½ a unit in a 24 hr period, tops!

If Edmond from "The Lion, The Witch, & The Wardrobe" had diabetes, would he have had enough insulin on his person to bolus for The Turkish Delight that the Snow Queen tempted him with?

IF The Matrix was fact instead of fiction, would you follow the white rabbit??? And which would you choose regarding your diabetes - The blue pill or the red?


Kim said...

I LOVE THIS! (And you!) <3

The thought of Batman trying to figure out how to get the pump tubing through his mylar suit has me giggling. :)

Caroline said...

Nahhh Kim, Alfred would be ALL OVER that sh!t. ;)

Alison said...

LOL. And I think I can answer some of your questions - Tinkerbell copes with his miniscule insulin requirements by counting it in fairy drops rather than units - http://www.shootuporputup.co.uk/2010/02/if-disney-did-diabetes%E2%80%A6// and Harry Potter knows all about diabetes because the marvellous bolus wizard came from the Hogwarts book of spells http://www.shootuporputup.co.uk/2009/07/diabetes-wizardry/ :-)

Rocking Doll Museum said...

GREAT post! ;D

Donna ((Sweet Momma)) said...

I'm womdering if Spiderman would have to check his sugar before swinging between buildings??? Can you imagine? If driving while low is dangerous, that would be DISASTROUS!! :)

GREAT post!!!

Cara said...

What about Fraggles? All they eat are radishes. How do you bolus for a radish only diet?

Michael Hoskins said...

This is wicked awesome, K2! Greatness at its most creative. Thanks for the laughs.

Meri said...

Bestest post ever! :)