Friday, October 31, 2008

Happy 31st Anniversary of being diagnosed with Diabetes - TRICK OR TREAT!

Top Pic: Me two months before my diagnoses
Bottom Pic: Me one year after my diagnoses with some of my siblings - still skinny (my head looks like a dashboard ornament and my hands look huge) and still a flirt.
Notice how I'm trying to sweet talk my sisters friend Moose instead of looking at the camera - I wanted to marry him!

Today is my 31st anniversary with diabetes and I’m celebrating -ensconcing myself in all that is good about my existence since my own personal "Diaversary/ "D-Day". I’m not going to talk about waiting for a cure, or the dia-bitch factor regarding being a diabetic. That’s for another post(s).

I’ve tried to write about my initial diagnoses for the past few days and it just wasn’t flowing the way I wanted it to. Maybe next week I’ll try writing about Halloween 1977, but for now I’m focusing on the celebration that is my life since the Halloween of “77”.

I’ve already written posts about why I refuse to hate my own diabetes and the gifts Diabetes has given me. Today I’m just going to add a few more gifts that I’m grateful for.

Diabetes has given me the gift of fear…. and the ability to be fearless. I use my fear as I way to stay healthy, I’m fearless because whenever the self doubt of diabetes creeps in my brain, I push it a side & reach for what I want. I wasn’t always that way – I used to fear the future so much that I couldn’t enjoy the present. That way of thinking caused nothing but paralyzing fear and self-doubt – neither of which was productive. Being fearless and moving past all the “what-ifs’ allows me to enjoy my life and appreciate it all – big and little.

I’ve written about this often, but diabetes has certainly developed my sick sense of humor. Laughing about all things diabetes has allowed me to be strong and has made others more comfortable in getting to know their own diabetes.

This gift of helping others through laughing and making fun of the “Big D”, has helped me more than I can even articulate at this moment.

Diabetes has given me the gift of ownership. The minute I started to really own my diabetes instead of fearing a life with it, diabetes ceased to own me. D and I continue to have a tug of war of power at times, but I’m the one who ends up winning. And I savor those victories, no mater how minuscule or monumental.

Diabetes has allowed me to weed out the fair weather friends in my life and focus on the ones who really matter. It’s given me appreciation of what friendship really is. Looking back in my life, my tried true friends always looked out for me in all aspects, including my diabetes, not because of my diabetes. I was and am so lucky to have friends who helped me take on my diabetes and deal with it head-on, instead of ignoring it or using it as an excuse not to be my friend.

The most recent and wonderful gift Diabetes has given me?
Well…. that would be you.

Every citizen of dBlogville (the Diabetes O.C.) is amazing! It’s been almost a year since I’ve discovered your existence and began to be on the receiving end all of your gifts.
You’ve given me the gifts of understanding, knowledge, commodity, commiseration, laughter, and tears.

There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t receive and appreciate these gifts from all of you – I thank God everyday that I’ve found you and hope that I can reciprocate all of those gifts back to you ten-fold.

To the parents of the D-O-C, you’ve showed me what my own parents went through and never shared with me. I look at them with a new sense of love and respect because each of you was brave enough to share your thoughts and fears in print. THANK-YOU.

To my Diabetic Compadres, “you get me” and all my d quirks without ever having to say a word, but I’m so glad that you do! I want to list you all individually, but I'm scared I'll leave someone out - and I deal with enough guilt!

I wish I could give everyone n dBlogville a big heart-felt hug, and promise that when we do meet -I will, whether you like it or not. Why, because I’m a hugger and I hug the one ones
I love.

Today I’m celebrating my 31 years with Cocoa Jones (not a porn star - well, maybe a porn star if porn came in the form of a chocolate baked good) but a damn fine maker of brownies that I found at my local organic food store a few weeks ago, and have been addicted ever since. I’ll bolus for the 28 grams of chocolately goodness and not give a crap about the calories or fat. Instead, I'll revel in the fact that the wonderfulness of chocolate is no longer off limits in my diabetes world.

Maybe later I’ll put on my witch costume and go trick or treating just for shits and giggles –

But whatever I do today, I will celebrate the fact that I am indeed doing it!


Crystal said...

Happy D-Anniversary!!

You've come a long way, no doubt. And you continue to move forward and That is what matters.

Your insight is refreshing, funny and wholesome -- meaning True. You are to the point, leave nothing out and can still laugh.

Enjoy the brownies, every single bite, savor the flavor and smell then eat some more. ;-)

Glad you're in/on the DOC. Keep up your great posts and insight. Many value you because you have been living as one with the big D for so long.

Thank you for you K2. Thank you.

And I would take a treat over a trick ANY day......

Lee Ann Thill said...

Happy D-anniversary!! I loved that! Enjoy that brownie, and please, if you go trick-or-treating, like I hope you will, take pictures!

George said...

Happy Diaversary and I am a hugger too!

Enjoy that brownie! :)

k2 said...

Your right, moving forward is all that matters!
Thank-you so much for all your kind words, they mean more to me that you could ever imagine.
Now as far as Trick Vs Treat - well that of course would depend on the trick ;)

I'm glad you loved it!!!
I will enjoy the brownie,VERY MUCH - & if a photo op occurs, I will try and capture the moment~

Naomi said...

There's nothing like a brownie to make the anniversary complete. MMMM warm from the oven!

Enjoy your D-anniversary.

k2 said...

George -
THANKS-Can't wait to give u a big Ninja hug!

Nomi -
The Brownie wasn't out of the oven, but it was damn delicious just the same!

Scott K. Johnson said...

Happy D-Anniversar Kelly! You have a real gift for showing the world who is the boss when it comes to your attitude in coping with our diabetes.

I so much appreciate all that you bring to the blogosphere, and can't wait to meet you in real life!

k2 said...

Thank you so much for all the kind words & sentiments - Right back @ ya!
I absolutely appreciate you as a citizen of dBlogville and look forward to meeting you in real life/time as well!
We need to organize a Conference for T1's who are all grown up - at least in body!

Cara said...

Awwww! You are a gift to me too!!!!! :D Diabetes has it's bad side, but the D OC is not part of that bad side. :D
I love the pictures, by the way. You were a cute kid. You remind me of this little girl who lived next door to me growing up.

k2 said...

You and the DOC are very much the bright side of diabetes!
Funny - I never thought I was a cute kid growing up - Thanks for the compliment. I wish I could have seem myself like you saw me! It would ave made the teen years much more easy to deal with!

Araby62 (a.k.a. Kathy) said...

Day late & a dollar short, but happy D-Day :) Glad you're here with us!

Penny Ratzlaff said...

Happy (late) anniversary!

k2 said...

Kathy & Penny -
Thanks for the kind sentiments and so glad to know you both!

Diane J Standiford said...

I "celebrate" my day of MS diagnosis too, takes away any power of sadness. Your post really got to me. I used to be fearless until the last few have shown me I need to embrace my fears and by overcoming them I will become stronger than ever. Sounds corny, but until I heard your words tonight...I was missing the obvious. Thank you.

k2 said...

Diane -
Thank-you for your heartfelt words on my behalf - they are greatly appreciated. And thank you for all the wonderful posts and pov's your blog brings to the web. You make people think and you make people smile.
Stay strong and remember-YOU ROCK!