Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I'm A Moretic....OR Introducing Molly Moretic, the Space-Cadet Diabetic

After reading and commenting on Cara's great post "I'm a Moron", I started thinking.

I came up (at least I think I came up with it, I'm not sure – I Googled it and I think I am - but again, I'm not sure - and on a personal note, I've had way to much caffeine if you can't already tell) with the term.

MORETIC, which is short for Moron Diabetic, which got me thinking for just one second of Toys R Us, more specifically Moretics R Us, and then I thought, "Yeah, that would apply to many of us in dBlogville – myself included. We’ve all written about our idiotic diabetic moments…we’ve all pushed, when we should have pulled so to speak. Each in every member of the D.O.C is a graduate of “Midvale, School for the Gifted.

It happens to all of us, as many of us on stated on Cara's blog. From time to time, even with all our hard work, we do moronic things regarding our diabetes – and in life.

I think we should start an official Moretics club with Membership cards- etc.

Tee shirts could be printed – Maybe “Moretics of the world unite!” - And instead of Gerry the Giraffe as our mascot we could have Molly Moretic - Space Cadet Diabetic.

Watch Molly as she tests, boluses, calculates and counts with the best of them, all the while –forgetting to correctly “plug-in” her infusion set. Like us all, she’s human, and mistakes happen – even in diabetes land.

Perhaps we could get sponsorship for our mishaps. For example, for every 10 infusion sets we get caught on doorknobs, our insulin pump company could give us a box free.

I say we get Cold Stone Creamery to give Moretics members a free ice cream for our
D – anniversary – I know we are capable of figuring out the carbs for that prize!

Speaking of carb counting, we could print Carb Counting cheat sheets to all MORETIC members.

We could have contests! You know, who has the funniest pump battery dying at the most inopportune moment story. Winner gets a stuffed Energizer Bunny and a 20 pack of pump batteries.

A year supply of Slinky’s would be given to the member with the most erratic blood sugars for the month.

Who ever is off the most in carb calculations could be given an abacus and "Deal A Meal," The Richard Simmons diet game that was big in the 90's.

Knee & elbow pads and a bike helmet could be awarded to the member who has the worst injury after being clunked in the face with their insulin pump. Just imagine the photo gallery!

Maybe members could have insulin bottles that are in rubber or plastic bottles instead of glass, since insulin bottle clumsiness seems to follow MORETICS wherever we go!

How about Bumper stickers?

“I break for Moretics.”

“I’m a friend of Molly M.”

“Moretically speaking….”

"Moretics - the few, the proud, the Moron Diabetic!"

The possibilities are endless and I could keep going - but I want to hear your moretic moves.

Moretics - It's just another part of the wonderfulness of living with diabetes!


Karen said...

Sign me up!!! Got a prize for taking your insulin pump out to clear BG reminder alarm, then leaving in lap while finishing round of knitting. THEN forgetting it's in your lap before getting up to get meter. Pump does a little thing I like to call Bungee Pumping. Happens to me a few times a week, no less. Yup, I'm Moretic too. :)

Cara said...

Ohhh, I want a T-shirt!!! :D

Scott K. Johnson said...

I am SO in.

I loved Karen's "Bungee Pumping" line - that is awesome.

Tee shirts that say "I'm with Moretic", then pointing at ourselves!

Funny kid line of the day, my nephew calls Toys R Us, "Toys R OURS". LOL!!! That's some awesome kid brain stuff happening right THAR!! w00t!

k2 said...

Karen -
Love the term "Bungee Pumping!"
I don't knit and it happens to me all the time - it's truly universal!

Cara -
Your a Board Member Moretic so, yeah know - a tee shirt is no problem!

Scott -
Love your tee-shirt ideal - ketches please! I need to think more like your nephew- obviously - he's a comedic GIANT in training!

Jill said...

OMG! I sat here giggling out loud and when just asked by my husband, what is so funny on that computer screen? My reply...you have to me a Moretic to understand! HAHAHAHA! ***wipes the tears from laughing*** You all are too funny! I'm sure I'll have my Mommy Moretic moments soon enough! It's nice to know that we CAN be human and forget stuff and not be considered a "bad parent".

Gimme the Carb cheat sheet on a wallet card...haha! Oh and I HAVE to have the "I love a Moretic" tshirt and bumper sticker ;)

George said...

I give uncle Richy a call and see if he has any more Deal a Meals lying around.

He keeps them in the drawer with his dove shorts.

LOL I win the slinky!

k2 said...

Jill -
Knowing that I made u laugh out loud and that you actually used the term "Moretic" in a sentence is AWESOME!!! THANK-YOU.
I will start working on the cheat sheet & Bumper Stickers and I am officially adding the term "Mommy Moretic Moment" in the Big Book of Moretics!!

k2 said...

George -
The Slinky is yours for the asking!

Hannah said...

Bungee pumping = best phrase ever!

The most moretic thing is when you're so klutzy, your bungee pump then lands directly on your toes. It's happened to me 487548768924 times.

Kathleen Cook said...

I loved this one. This is the 1st time that I ever heard of her, but I think she has a wild sense of humor.

Good work Karen.

Kathy Cook

Val said...

Hey, can I get a prize for accidentally crocheting 2dc that included my pump tubing??? I had visions of walking around connected to a blanket for the rest of my life - or at least until the next site change... : P

Luckily I noticed as I started stitch number three...

Lora said...

Hi. My name is Lora and I'm a Moretic. Please see: wait, did I give myself that insulin shot or do I just have last night's shot in my memory bank, pretending to be tonight's shot...

k2 said...

Kathleen -
Karen is WILD!

Val -
You definitely get the "Arts and Crafts award" given to the Moretic who most incorporates their Moretic ways into their love of arts and crafts! Your prize - A Bedazzler - SUPER GROOVY

Hi Lora -
Welcome to Moretics R US!
Might I suggest Time stamping your injection site!