Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Craptacular, Craptacular: The Meat Monster Edition - RELEASE THE KRAKEN!!

From the official Burger King "Meat Monster" Press Release.
Currently, only available in Japan. Hence the reason it's written in Japanese~

Ahhh, Craptacualar, Craptacular! THE MEAT MONSTER! Brought to you by the Epicurean minds of Burger King!

SO I was reading the Huffington Post, when an article about something called,THE MEAT MONSTER caught my eye. No, it wasn't the name of a porn movie,it was the name of a the latest burger from Burger King.

Th "Meat Monster" costs close to ten dollars and is loaded with two beef patties, lots of bacon, and a chicken breast. That's right ladies & gentlemen, here's a way to grease up your arteries, clog up your intestines, and screw up your blood sugar but good!

And according to the those in "the know" at The Consumerist, "The Meat Monster" contains "1160 calories, 24g of saturated fat, 240mg of cholesterol, 13g of sugar, 54g carbs, 69g of fat, 1.5g of trans fat, and 2290mg sodium."

My stomach is having sympathy cramps just thinking about it!
So as a PWD, of course I thought: How the hell would you bolus for that? Not that I ever would, but I was still really curious!

So I wrote to my friend Gary Scheiner, CDE Extraordinaire & Mr. Type 1 University himself:

Hey Gar -


So, do you feel like answering a diabetes riddle that will be read by masses? Or at least by a few friends?

if the answer is YES, then my question to you is: How exactly would one bolus for Burger King's New MEAT MONSTER burger?

Here's the nutritional breakdown before you click on the link to the beast!

1160 calories, 24g of saturated fat, 240mg of cholesterol, 13g of sugar, 54g carbs, 69g of fat, 1.5g of trans fat, and 2290mg sodium.

Here's the link to the beast of a burger!


And here's his answer!

Ohhhhhh Baby! Sounds like a Homer Simpson creation.

Must admit, I have eaten stuff like this from time to time. The giant bucket of movie theater popcorn packs a similar punch. Here's what I'd recommend to control the blood sugar after the BK Behemoth :

1. Base the bolus on the full 54g carb. I doubt this thing has any fiber.

2. Deliver the bolus over time. All that fat will undoubtedly slow down digestion. If you have a pump, deliver the first 1/3 of the bolus immediately, and the remaining 2/3 over a 2 hour period. If you take shots, either use Regular (R) insulin or split the meal dose into two parts: half with the meal and the other half 90 minutes later.

3. It ain't over yet! All that fat is going to send triglycerides soaring, which will cause the liver to become insulin resistant, which will send BG up gradually for hoursafter the carbs are done doing their thing. Pump users can set a temp basal increase of 50-80% for approximately 8-10 hours; injectors can take some extra NPH insulin after the meal.

Now kick back and enjoy - Because this meal might just be your last.

And now you know!

FYI: Currently, said Meat Monster is only available at Burger Kings in Japan. Fries, tums, stomach pump and a plunger for your toilet are not included with purchase of said "Meat Monster.

OH, one more thing: RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Kraken, Crackin, cracked ass, whatever - No good can come of this~


Penny said...

Holy Mother!!!! I think I spit up a bit in my mouth after I saw the picture! Who orders this stuff?
I sincerely LOVE that Gary would know how to correctly bolus for it!!! That's why he is so near and dear to my heart. Great stuff Gary - thank you, though I think nary Grace nor I will venture toward it, ever.
K - you should start a sidebar tally of all the monstrous foods out there - the pizza and 'wingz' - this, etc. That would be seriously funny.

George said...

I would just pull the bacon out and huck the rest.

Awesome guidance! Thanks Gary!

Michael Hoskins said...

Awesome, K2! Thanks for sharing that guidance. Now, I can't say I've yet to try this monstery goodness, but I'd probably be right on the money with that bolus breakdown (maybe a 30-70 or 40-60 split). Thank you for that, Gary.

Wendy said...

Have you heard about the Hardee's Monster Thick Burger?

Total Calories 1320
Calories From Fat 860
Fat (g) 95
Saturated Fat (g) 36
Cholesterol (mg) 210
Sodium (mg) 3020
Carbohydrates (g) 46
Dietary Fiber (g) 2
Sugars (g) 6
Protein (g) 70

Alexis Nicole said...

Eww! my husband is all YUMMY. blechh!

But thank you for posting Garys how to bolus for it, it just helped me bolus for upcoming buffet!


Lydia said...

Bleh... As a newly diagnosed type 1 diabetic, I'm glad I'm vegan and should (hopefully) not have to worry about encountering such an... Abomination.

On another note, no one told me that too much fat can raise blood sugar! Hmm... That does explain why my numbers have been a wee bit too high since I've started eating three servings or so of nuts a day.

Denise said...

I could feed my whole family with that! (almost)

Becky V said...

Gary should include the assumption that 1 person can actually consume all of that in one sitting...and that it stays down for the full 3-4(or more) hours to actually be past the point of vomitous. (Ack, it is just too disgusting.)

Though everything tastes better with bacon, so maybe I am being too harsh!

Heidi / D-Tales said...

All I can think is NO WAY!!!

Scott K. Johnson said...

I love Gary's last line! Ha!