Thursday, June 14, 2012

Diabetes Dancer As Stunt Woman.

I'm an excellent dancer, but for the life of me #IcantWalkAndFixedPrimeAtTheSameTime. #FACT

Diabetes Dancer in the Middle~
And thanks to a certain "singing nurse" for posting on "the facebook!"

So I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m an excellent dancer when the music is playing, heck I was an honest to goodness tap dancer after all. But when the music's off..... Not so much. 
On Tuesday night after driving home from #ada2012 in the rain and dragging my suitcase in the house in said pouring rain. I immediately unpacked,("Oh, if only I had done that when I moved" she said with a SIGH,)  showered and put on my most comfy PJs. Then I grabbed a yogurt for dinner and  I made myself my old standby: A GINORMOUS glass of Seltzer water with extra lime squeezed fresh and a dash of Cranberry juice. And by dash I mean the water turns pale pink color and it’s virtually carb free. 
I was tired and all I wanted to do was sit down on my couch and veg-out. And that’s exactly what I did. I ate my yogurt ( I love me some Greek Berry Yogurt)  and drank my “bubbly water” and watched TV. 
Then about 20 minutes later I  looked down at my pump and realized that I had 5 units left - And I also needed to crack open a fresh bottle of insulin.
So instead of putting my seltzer on the coffee table ( I didn’t have coaster handy and I’m really trying to be good about that,) I placed my ginormous glass of seltzer with a dash of cranberry and extra lime gingerly on the carpet next to the couch and made a mental note to walk around the parameter of the seltzer, not directly in its path, and that’s exactly what I did. 
I went to my fridge’s butter compartment, grabbed a bottle of insulin a reservoir and infusion set. BTW, have I ever mentioned that  my new “thing” is keeping a hand full of reservoirs & infusion sets in my butter compartment along with my insulin? 
Ironically, I don’t actually keep any butter whatsoever in there, but I digress. If you keep a few reservoirs/infusion sets in there, every time you open a new bottle of insulin, it’s one less diabetes step you don’t have to do. And I’m all about diabetes time saving. 
So anyway, I stood at the counter and put in a new infusion set and filled my reservoir, Primed, Rewind (Rewond?) , Manually Primed, and then Fixed Primed my pump all nice and lickety split like. 

Then I walked back to the living room and had just made another mental note to walk no where near the ginormous glass of seltzer (and I steered clear), and was just about to sit back down on the couch, when I decided to look at my pump to see how far along my fixed prime was. 
And somehow right at the exact moment I was looking down at my  pump, I tripped over my own two feet and my insulin pump flew in the air and it narrowly missed smashing onto the top of the coffee table (same goes for my head on the corner of the coffee table) and I fell onto the couch instead of the floor. Me thinks this might not have happened if the music had been blaring..... 

And had a camera been rolling I easy could have won $10,000 and maybe been offered a job in Hollywood as a Diabetes Stunt Woman. 
And my glass of ginormous seltzer water with a dash of cranberry and extra fresh squeezed lime?? Well, that was now all over my carpet and I ran to the kitchen and grabbed some tea towels and started to clean up the mess I’d just created.

Seriously folks, you can’t make this sh*t up. 


Scott E said...

And the moral of the story: always have a camera pointed at you, capturing your every move, because you never know. Or, maybe the moral is to use a coaster. Your choice; they're both good.

Anonymous said...

Here is my change set tip.... When I get my supplies i package resevoir,quick set, lancet into small zip lock bags. It allows me to grab everything at one time. It keeps me from going back and forth to my d cabinet. Love your stories.