Whenever I have a brand spanking new reservoir that’s filled to the brim with that life saving elixir called INSULIN, I have this weird sense of normal.
It’s not a bad sense of normal, just a weird sense of normal.
For some reason knowing that for the most part, I don’t have to fiddle with a bottle of insulin for a few days makes me a happy camper. I like to refer to this feeling as: Full Reservoir Syndrome / Euphoria.
Yes, I wear my electric pancreas clipped to my hip, and I’m forever lancing myself to input my numbers to said electric pancreas, but that’s my normal and not actually having a daily interaction with an insulin bottle is a wonderful thing in Kelly’s world.
For the first few days of Full Reservoir Syndrome/Euphoria, I don’t even think about the insulin in my reservoir, (unless the insulin’s gone skunky,) because for the most part, I know (OK, I feel very strongly,) that I’m covered.
Instead, I'm free to worry about blood sugars gone wild, dodging doorknobs, avoiding dead spots, etc., etc., etc.
Currently, I have 5.7 units of short acting insulin left... And since sometime early yesterday evening, the low reservoir alarm has been reminding me that It’s almost time to change out the old for the new.
And for some reason, it makes me sigh a little melancholy sigh.
It’s not that changing the reservoir is a pain, because it's really not. Actually, it’s super quick and easy and takes less two minutes of my time, so why do I become a little bit of “Melancholy baby? ”
Most likely it’s because it reminds me that without a insulin for my reservoir, I’m toast.
And for the record, I already know I'm toast without insulin, full reservoir or not.
So..... Have you ever experienced full Reservoir Syndrome/ Euphoria? Diabetesalicious minds want to know ;)
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6 comments:
So funny because in Lauren's pumping years (she's on a break) even though she wanted me to have as little to do with her D as possible as a teen, her one request was: "Keep my reservoir full. I don't even ever have to want to think about it!" I never got it until now!
I experience the same euphoria. And I feel that way when my gas tank is full too, LOL. This morning Brendon walked back in the house after leaving for the bus to tell me he only had 2 units left. After being flustered and hurried while changing it so he could make the bus on time, I felt soooo relaxed that he had a fresh set and a full cartridge.
It's not so much having a full resevoir that gets me, it's having an almost empty one. On my pump, it tells me how much time I have left until it's empty, and it feels like it's telling me that's how much time I have left to live. Like when a doctor tells a cancer patient, "You have 6 months to live." To see that "Time left: 7 hours" is just like a punch in the gut.
You've got 7 hours before your body is going to start shutting down because you don't make your own damn insulin anymore.
It's a very, very scary realization.
I have experienced this. . usually right after returning from a restaurant, where I didn't order anything because I realized I didn't have enough insulin to eat. DANG! I fill the reservoir and feel like I can tackle Cold Stone and eat whatever I want. . at least for the next 2.5 days.
I'm that way too. I think it's more that I don't have the time to deal with empty reservoirs and refilling so it just feels REALLY good to now I have 3 days before I *have* to stop again.
Luv me a FULL reservoir in Sugar's pump!!! LOVE IT!
In fact, she went camping with her dad a few weeks ago, and I made him fill it with 5 or 6 days worth...because she could get lost int he woods, you know?
Totally get it ;)
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