Friday, August 2, 2013

Of Temporary Basal Rates, Burgers, Bread Baskets & Friends Who Worry~

I met up with a large group of friends at a new bar/restaurant a few weeks back, and the minute I walked in the joint and saw the 8 inch high burgers( insert sex/meat joke here. Also, THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID, ) and Belgium fries pass by on the server's tray,  I started a temporary basal rate of 30% - Because I was going to need it! 
More and more people were arriving and our party was getting better. We went from a table of eight, to 3 tables for 16+ people and we hadn't even placed our food orders yet. 
So a few of us that wanted to get on with the business of ordering decided to go ahead and order & get a separate check for the 5 of us. 
And I casually mentioned that I was on an increased temporary basal rate in anticipation of the burgers and didn't feel like waiting an hour before I placed ordered because: 
1. I was hungry
2. I was hungry and I didn't feel like waiting
3. I had taken extra insulin via my amped up temp basal rate.   

And that would be when my 2 friends immediately started to worry in stereo.

Friend A: Do you need food, because I could go grab some bread.
Me: No, I'm fine. My blood sugar was 170 when I tested a few minutes ago, I'm great!
Friend B: Are you sure? I could get you some orange juice. 
Me: Thanks, but honestly, not a big deal. Also, I have glucose tabs (Cherry Glucolift to be exact,) just in case.
Friend B: Here- I have a cough drop - it has sugar in it. 
Me: My cold is almost gone, but thanks.
Friend B: Not for your cold, for your blood sugar. 
Me: Oh... Ok. Honestly though, I'm not hungry, but thanks.
And then I took the cough drop from her hand and ate it, even though I really didn't want to, because I thought it would make my friend feel better. 
Small chit chat followed and Friend A excused herself and 5 minutes later she came back with a basket filled with hot bread and butter. 
Friend A: Hey - I got bread from the waitress.
Me - feeling guilty: I'm fine & you really didn't have to do that. I'm getting a burger and fries, I shouldn't eat bread, but thanks.
Sidebar: Turning down bread is so damn hard!
Friend A: I got it for me, not you
Me: OK, cool. But thanks anyway. Also, I know you got it for '"us," emphasis on "me." 
Friend A: I can't help it, I worry about you. 
Friend B: It's just how we are - we love you - we don't want you to go low or get sick .

The 3 of us had been friends since college, they'd known my sister Debbie and they were good to her. And there were days when they could deal with her being sick better than I could. These women (they were sisters,)  loved my parents and my family and I consider them family. 
And their concern made me grateful, happy and slightly sad all rolled into one. 
I was incredibly grateful for my wonderful friends. 
I was happy because having said wonderful friends who get and accept you - regardless of your busted pancreas are more precious than gold. 

And I was a slightly sad because I was the one who was making my friends worry - And I that made me feel slightly guilty

15 minutes later and 10 minutes before my burger arrived, I bolused for my food, including two slices of dinner roll. Not because I wanted to and not because I had to, but because the diabetes guilt was creeping in and I could tell that my friends were still a bit anxious.
And lets be honest, turning down bread is not an easy thing to do - AND IT COULD BE SO MUCH WORSE. AND IT WAS DELICIOUS!  
Diabetes guilt or not, good friends are gifts - And I am one lucky duck, indeed. 


StephenS said...

Don't know if this is appropriate... but I was talking to someone yesterday about how a bolus works, and all the things that have to be considered before I arrive at my total. Their reaction was that they never knew even half that much about diabetes. I said imagine living your life and almost never coming into contact with someone who understands even half of what you do every day to stay alive.

Thanks for your post. Glad you have friends who care so much.

Lora said...

I was wondering how in the world you were going to NOT eat the bread ;) I can't do it... I have tried!

I am glad you have such awesome friends. I hope that Justin will find the same one day.

Dolores said...

I am a T1 mom not T1 myself but I find myself constantly doing this balancing act where I need to take care of son (like treat a low during a ball game) and at the same time not freak out his friends and fellow parents ... Annoying at times ... But you're right ... It is so nice to know there are so many people around who care!

Reyna said...

I LOVE that you choked down the cough drop. :)

Your friends sound fab. And...way.2.go on the bread girl. xo

Sandy said...

I love that your friends understand!

Misty said...

So happy for awesome friends!