Diabetes Challenges - The Grown Up Edition

Growing up with diabetes was a challenge - just ask my mother, who mothered three children and a husband with type 1 diabetes.
Ask "Kelly In The Past," who had her share of trying to fit in and be normal - It wasn't always easy.
Ask my oldest friends, who saw the good, bad, and diabetesalicious of it all.

I think one of the reasons I became such a loyal friend is because of diabetes. I know the value of having friends who are there regardless of a faulty pancreas.

And now that I'm all grown up, diabetes is still a challenge - and new challenges have popped up.

There are fleeting moments that I forget about diabetes. OK, not forget, but some things, like testing my blood sugar, and immediately counting carbs when ever food enters my mind or is presented on my plate, have become so automatic that they've become second nature to me, like breathing and hating liver.

The longer I live with diabetes, the more I worry about "The Diabetes What If's." And I know that a little worry can be productive, but too much can be down right paralyzing.
I still struggle with the worry, but I'm handling much better than I have in the past - And that's directly related to being part of the Diabetes on-line community.

Then there's the challenge of people (mostly perfect strangers) asking me if I can have kids because, you know, I have (said in a concerned tone) diabetes. Or ,they switch it up a bit and ask me if the reason I don't have kids is because of my diabetes. For the record, diabetes is NOT the reason I have yet to be called "Mommy", but honestly, it's none of their business!
I don't ask (OK, most of the time I don't ask) those nosey nellies the last time they took a crap or had sex, so why is it OK to ask me about my reproductive long term plans, decisions, etc?

Diabetes and dating was never a problem before. I was always honest and upfront regarding my diabetes, but I was the one who decided when it was time to bring up my diabetes. When I did decide to share my diabetes, it was usually on the 4th or 5th date, when I knew that things were going well - And it was never a deal breaker in any of my long term relationships.
But now that I blog about diabetes on a daily basis, and the name of my blog is on my business card - And we live in the age where Google has become a pre-dating pre-requisite, the decision of when to share my diabetes with a potential significant other is no longer mine.

And I'll admit, not having control in that area bothers me.

With that being said, I would never go back to my life pre Diabetesaliciousness.
Diabetes blogging has given me a voice; a passion, a community, a career, and an irreplaceable support system that I need, want, and could not live without in my life.

Life will always present us with challenges, faulty pancreas or not. That doesn't mean we stop being or doing.
In fact, it's just the opposite, we learn new ways to continue doing, becoming and evolving.

And that my Diabetesalicious friends, is what living is all about!

The official BUZZ term on the internets is: Cristin Milioti, 30 Rock Scene Stealer!!

CRAZY PROUD AUNT ALERT: Thanks for being so awesome and allowing me to brag! I Spoke with Cristin about an hour ago and when I told her how many supporters and fans she has in the Diabetes On-line Community, she was thrilled & sends her thanks!
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As I mentioned in yesterdays post, my niece Cristin appeared on 30Rock last night -And she WAS AMAZING!
I promise, no more bragging after this - But honestly, I just can't help myself!
I'm SO PROUD of her!!

When you hold someone in your arms as a baby, watch them grow (and damn if she wasn't a cute kid,) develop their talents,(including spot on impersonations) all the while remaining down to earth, gracious, caring, funny and dow nright bawdy as hell, you can't help but want them to succeed and burst with pride when they do!!

I'm proud of everyone of my 12 nieces and nephews- Each is an amazing and individual piece of art and I'm so happy to have them in my life - And I LOVE THEM ALL VERY MUCH and am continully blown away at all of their talent and successes!!

OK, enough with the sappy Aunt stuff!

The official BUZZ term on the Internets is: Cristin Milioti, 30 Rock Scene Stealer!!
See for yourself!

http://www.aolnews.com/2011/02/25/cristin-milioti-5-facts-on-the-30-rock-actress-who-stole-the/

http://www.google.com/trends/hottrends?sa=X&date=2011-2-24

http://blogs.babble.com/famecrawler/2011/02/25/cristin-milioti-30-rock-guest-star/

http://uinterview.com/news/cristin-miliotis-baby-talk-conquers-30-rock-2298

http://marketingpixels.com/trends/cristin-milioti-watch-the-30-rock-scene-stealers-sopranos-past/

http://www.examiner.com/pop-culture-in-hartford/cristin-milioti-30-rock-scene-stealer-she-did-the-same-the-sopranos

http://www.tvsquad.com/2011/02/25/30-rock-season-5-episode-16-recap/

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/showtracker/2011/02/30-rock-recap-joan-of-snark.html?cid=6a00d8341c630a53ef0147e2d07ff7970b

Stay tuned......

Lab Work Held Hostage, Validation From My Endo, & Watch 30Rock Tonight!!!

The Waiting Game......

I made it to my endo appointment yesterday with 10 minutes to spare, and the waiting game officially began.

I checked in electronically, (because my Endo office became high tech overnight) and waited for my name to be called.

When it was, I went to the front desk, and paid my outrageous co-pay and asked: Did you get my labs?

And I waited patiently while the receptionist checked. Turns out, she did not. There was nothing that looked like my lab work was showing up on the computer (did I mention they were all high tech) and she put in a call to LabCore.

I was nervous and agitated. This wasn’t the first time my insurance company designated lab company had screwed up my lab work, but I TRIED to remain calm. I could feel my blood pressure boiling and I was ready to call LabCore myself.

I was sent back to the waiting room and waited. My name was AGAIN called and I was led back to the area were I would be weighed (UGH) my blood pressure was taken (normal) and my finger was stabbed. Blood sugar was 175, two hours after lunch. I could live with that – and gave myself a correction bolus.

Then I was led to an examination room, where I was left to my own devices ( twitter, email, and note scribbling) and waited. And WAITED. AND WAITED.

Finally, Dr. J came in and said something along the lines of: The lab won’t release your lab work without your social security number. What is it?

Me: Whaaaaat? Why is my lab work being held hostage?

He repeated something about my ss# and only having the last 4 digits in my file that he was holding in his hand and a miscommunication between the original lab that took my body fluids and shipped them off to LabCore so they would be covered my my insurance. I gave him the rest of my digits, and off he went. Did I mention the fact that I was impressed that Dr. J was dealing with this LabCore snafu?

I looked at the clock, and thought about the small ransom I was paying in parking fees and wondered if I could send the bill to LabCore. Did I mention that I couldn't find any street parking and was paying through the nose at the hospital's parking garage?

Finally Dr. J returned and said: Hello Kelly! I have your lab your lab results and I’m really quite happy.

Me: You are?

Dr J: YES, I really am! Your kidneys, liver function are normal, cholesterol is great, and no anemia or thyroid problems to speak of. Seriously good numbers all around! Care to guess what your a1c is?

Me: Honestly, I have no idea at this point Doc. I can't even guess.

Dr J: OK, I’ll tell you. 7.1 down from 7.4 at your last visit – I’m really thrilled with your labs and your A1C progress.

Me: OK, I’m shocked. I’m thrilled, but I’m shocked none the less. Dr. J, I’ve been feeling really burned out as of late. I mean I’m doing what I have to do, but I know I need to do more. I’m always tired and my exercise is almost none existent these days. I stopped the Symlin because my only large meal is at dinner. I barely eat during the day! Not to mention the whole insurance, Symlin thing.

Dr J: You stopped the Symlin. OK, we need to try again. Don’t worry that you’re only taking it once a day. That’s OK. I really think if you give at another try, you’re going to feel better – because your numbers are going to be even better and your liver won't be dumping as large of sugar because you won't be spiking as much. OK, keep in mind, I'm paraphrasing and the liver part is somewhat sketchy in my memory.

Me: My insurance company is raking me over the coals as far as Symlin is concerned. They want almost $200 dollars a month for a Symlin pen and I when I heard that, I was like, no way, I’m done. If it weren’t for my friend (who shall remain nameless, per her request) sending me her Symlin pens (she stopped taking them, but her pens had already been paid for by her insurance) I wouldn’t have any.

Dr. J: OK, you know what? Your insurance is wrong to charge you that much for one Symlin pen - Shop around and see what other pharmacies will charge - I’ll write you another script. In the mean time, come to me if you need more. I’m going to grab you some more samples and you should be good for a few months.

Did I mention how much I love my Endo?

I talked to him about cutting my cholesterol meds and he agreed that going on the lowest dose of simvistatin (10mgs) would be fine. And then he told me that if I was still having hair volume issues we could look at other medications.

Then we talked about the whole 1 and million thing and how my Eye Specialist had passed away.

Me: I hate his partner and I’m not going back.

Dr J: Why?

Me: Because when I went for my appointment last time, he wasn’t nice, and he didn’t read my file before he came in to exam me. He was “shocked” at how young I was. And I called him on not reading my file. He said something like, well, I just saw ocular occlusion and diabetic and I just assumed you were a senior citizen.

Dr J: First off, your ocular occlusion had NOTHING to do with your diabetes! And secondly, I don’t care how busy a Dr. is, he or she always has time to read a patients file – It’s not an option, it’s a must! I agree, go to another specialist – I would if it were me.

Did I mention that at that point, I just wanted to give him a big hug!

We finished up our exam, and then he gave me a boatload of medicine samples.

I left my Endo feeling happy with myself regarding my diabetes for the first time in a very long time. I still have work to do, but I don't feel like the battle is ALL uphill. And I also left feeling validated - which is something I always feel when I leave Dr. J's office, regardless of my lab results. I'm really lucky that I have a great Endo who listens to my concerns, makes me feel good, and works with me!

Now, for something completely different & fantastical!

My niece Cristin will be featured on 30Rock tonight, so I highly suggest you watch!

Here’s a production still with her and Tina Fey!! Cristin is an amazing talent and she's a salt of the earth young woman to boot!

Did I mention the fact that I love her very much and I’m SO PROUD OF HER!

Tina & Cristin filming 30Rock - Episode 516: TGS Hates Women!

Endo Appointment Day

Date: 2/23/11

TIME: Now

BLOOD SUGAR: 144

FEELING: Nervous

Well, I'm just about to hop in my car and drive off to my Endo appointment!

I'm scared, nervous and very apprehensive. No matter how much I love my Endo, I hate Endo appointment day. My stomach is already in knots and I'm practicing a smile that doesn't look forced or fake.

Will my test results cause tears or a sincere smile?

What am doing right and how much am I doing wrong?

Am I the only one who holds their breathe on Endo appointment day,

And would you mind sending some positive vibes my way?

OK, regarding those last two lines - I wasn't even trying to rhyme!

But I still would totally appreciate any and all positive vibes, so thanks in advance~

Blood Sugars Gone Wild

Sometimes I think life gives us some not so subtle reminders that SHIT HAPPENS, and that no matter what, we need plow through the muck and get back on track!

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The past 16 hours have sucked blood sugar wise – And I’m going to be totally honest with you, it scared the shit out of me.

Starting at 9pm last night, my numbers started to go all spaceman on me. Seriously, it was like my body decided that it wanted to go to mars, and didn’t care if I wanted to go along for the ride.

The day started out picture perfect, numbers stayed in the 120’s most of the day. Dinner I was 168, but I wasn’t too concerned.

I was eating a low carb dinner (salmon, ½ a sweet potato and sautéed broccoli) and bolused accordingly. Later (because fish always leaves me hungry an hour later), I had some low carb chips and salsa (this snack never screwed with my numbers before) and once again, I bolused accordingly.

I was tired last night. I’d been fighting a sore throat since last Thursday and had worked a full day. I wanted to veg-out. I got in PJ’s and settled down in front of the TV.

But soon I had a headache, and my high blood sugar radar jumped into gear.

At 9 p.m I took my blood sugar and it was 250

And that's when my blood sugar started going apocalyptic.

9:30 PM: 235

10:15 PM: 260

I changed my site, thinking it would help.

11:30 PM: 277 – and I still had insulin on board. But I gave myself extra 1.5 units anyway.

Cut to 7:00 AM this morning: I was blowing a 459 – That’s not a typo people, that’s was my actual blood sugar - and it freaked me out. I was really scared and I seriously couldn’t recall (though I'm sure it was recent) the last time my blood sugar had been over 250, (except for last night), let alone 459.

My lips were so cracked they were bleeding and I was thirsty, but I didn’t feel dizzy or nauseous, just frightened.

I tested again, 447 - Don't even get me started on meter inaccuracies! Then I started cursing myself for not setting my alarm for a 3am #bg check!

I mumbled: Kelly, how the fuck could you be so stupid!! And then I got to work on situation.

I changed my site again. I had 10 units of left insulin in my cartridge, but I switched it out for a new insulin anyway.

I tested for ketones and held my breath. NOTHING – How the hell is that possible? But at least something was going right.

But I peed on a ketone strip again just to be certain. Still, no ketones.

I gave myself the biggest correction bolus of my life – 9.4 units and waited.

And my numbers started going down.

360

340

290

238

196

And currently, my blood sugar is 178.

I’m starting to breathe again – but I’m still cautious, and cautiously optimistic.

I still worked on work stuff all morning, while working through my blood sugar rebellion, drinking massive doses of water and one cup of coffee and I’m thankful that my numbers were heading south and I had no ketones.

But I’m still not sure what happened. Was it a wicked combo of fighting off a sore throat, an infusion set ceasing to work, insulin getting all skunky, and misbehaving carbs all working together for a perfect storm of blood sugars gone wild?

Honestly, I don’t care what it was, as long it never happens again!

I’ve worked hard to maintain my numbers and the past 16 hours reminded me exactly why.

Diabetes Food Quirks

Do I dare to eat a peach?

I have some idiosyncrasies when it comes to food. OK, I’m not like those people you see on My Strange Addiction or Freaky Eaters .

I don’t eat the stuffing from couch cushions or food from the trash. Food textures don’t bother me and I don’t fear vegetables or foods because of their color or how many vowels they contain. I’m OK and with most food smells, however, I don’t do liver and I don’t like handling raw animal protein IF I can help it. But that doesn’t stop me from grilling fish or bringing home some bacon and frying it up in a pan!

Actually, there aren’t too many foods I don’t like. But because of diabetes, I think I might have developed some weird food... Quirks.

Like when I was growing up, one of my favorite snacks was a ½ of banana with peanut butter. Half, because the Diabetes Exchange Poster in our kitchen said I could only eat ½ a banana. And to this day, unless the banana is small, I’ll most likely only eat a ½ of banana.Same goes with small apples & peaches verses large ones.

I don’t drink juice anymore, but as child, the diabetes exchange list only allowed for ¼ of a glass of OJ. Anything else was totally off limits. Which meant sometimes when I’d go over a friends house, I’d go all types of batshit on the Tropicana Pure Premium.

My mom never bought or cooked baked potatoes bigger than a tennis ball and I was OK with that. And even now, when I go out for dinner as an adult and the protein comes with a baked potato, I can't eat more than ½ a spud.

I’ve written this before, but I had some major arguments with my parents regarding the number of grapes (12) that the diabetes exchange diet said I was allowed to eat. Seriously, who the hell eats 12 grapes?

Now, even with the freedom of carb counting, it’s really hard for me to eat more than 12 grapes – Because in my head I think I’m breaking all sorts of diabetes commandments, even though I know I’m not.

Like Alfred J Proofrock, I feel as if “I have measured out my life with coffee spoons,”

and as a child and now adult with diabetes, food became (and is still) is all about portions. ½'s verses wholes, ¼ cups instead of thirds, allotted amounts instead of how much I actually wanted to eat. And now it's all about numbers!

Today, label reading is key and carb grams jump out at me in bold print.

But back in the day, there was no such thing as carb counting and IT SUCKED.

When I was in grade school, we had the option of going home for lunch. I lived in a small town; most moms stayed at home, and I lived directly across the street from my school.

And I actually really liked going home for lunch. I liked seeing my parents and watching 15 minutes of cartoons or McCale’s Navy or Hogan’s Hero reruns on TV.

Sometimes I’d eat at school, but my parents weren’t thrilled about that option for obvious reasons. But I was always allowed to bring friends home for lunch, and sometimes I’d bring my friend Leslie. We’d eat our lunches out on the front porch and talk about school, skateboarding (she was an awesome skateboarder) and movies. Leslie always ate a fluffer nutter sandwich on white bread, and I’d eat a turkey or a baloney and cheese sammie. Sometimes Leslie would want to trade, but the FLUFF part of the sandwich scared me - due to the whole “it could kill me“ thing and I never wanted to try it.

To this day, I’ve still never eaten Fluff, or cotton candy.

I grew up eating a lot chicken because my dad had heart disease. But I never ate chicken with the skin on it – my mother literally cut it off with shears because of my dad's dietary restictions - I still don't eat chicken with the skin on it, same goes for turkey. We stopped eating wonder bread when I was in the 4th grade, and my parents forced the skim milk on me when I was in middle school. I don’t ever remember actually using the saltshaker on my food. Instead, I’d always shake some salt in my palm, than sprinkle it gingerly on my food.

And then there's the whole guilt that diabetes brings re: food.

As a child I learned that exercise = getting your numbers to where it needs to be after ingesting contraband Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. So I’d do jumping jacks in my room to try and burn off the the forbidden food.

In middle school I'd a sneak a candy bar and then I'd flush the wrapper down the toilet. Afterwards, I'd go ride my bike for an hour. Sometimes when I was over a friend's house, I'd sneak a slice of coffee cake from their fridge on the way to the bathroom. And then I’d lie about it if I got caught. I’m not proud of what I did, but growing up in the Diabetes Dark Ages, there was no such thing as flexibuility or carb counting, insulin sliding scales, etc. And it was HARD.

We were 13 year olds suffering from diabetes burnout, except it didn’t have a name and we were told that we were bad. We weren't, we were tired and frustrated - But we felt guilty just the same.

High School brought brought more challenges. I wanted to fit in and eat McDonald's sundaes with the rest of the kids after Play practice. On occasion I’d eat French-fries and tastykakes at lunch and I'd washed them down with diet coke. Some days I’d come home from school and I’d be so tired I’d fall asleep on the couch. Not because I was getting up every morning at 6:00 to catch the bus at 7:12, which I was. No, it was because my blood sugar was skyrocketing. Scholastically speaking, I seriously don’t know how I made it through certain parts of high school.

Our family of 3 diabetics shared 1 meter, the size of a brick that took 3 minutes to calibrate and cost hundreds of dollars. Taking it out of our house was not an option!

Luckily, I got scared straight and embraced owning my diabetes sometime in the mid 90’s.

But even as recently as 10 years ago, when I was working out with a personal trainer and was the epitome of a "Brick House," I still let other peoples food issues/influences come into play in my world of food quirks.

My ex-trainer, while technically excellent, had the sensitivity of a drill sargent and a heart that was 4 sizes too small. She had me eating chicken and spinach twice a day and told me that any meals over 15 grams of carbs were a no-no. Bread, for the most part, was off limits.

Anyway, about a year after I started training, I started dating, and then eventually moving in with my ex BF. I gained 6 lbs of the 20 lbs I’d lost back (because lets face it, when in your newly in love, you eat and have fun, and chicken and spinach twice a day looses it’s appeal,) my trainer flipped her bitch switch and became down right mean: Your going to gain weight again. Don’t tell anyone you work with me - I’ll lose money because of how your starting to look.

And yet, I still worked out with that bitch three days a week (at 6 a.m.) before work, because I wanted to be healthy. I knew that even though I had gained some weight, the fact that I was working out was a really great thing - I didn't want to stop!

But when I made the decision to go on a pump, She REALLY freaked out.

She told me that going on the insulin pump was my excuse to eat and not be accountable for what food I was putting in my body. I told her she was nuts and that she needed to get a clue. And that I was running out of injection real estate and that being on the pump would not only help save my skin, but also help keep me from spiking in either direction.

And it was at that moment that I was done with her. I realized that she didn’t get my diabetes – And she didn’t want to. She was a size four idiot who burned bridges with her clients when they didn't do what she wanted!

She was the one with issues, BIG ONES - And I'd take my quirks any day!

As of today, I’m still not at my fighting weight, but I’m OK. I’m not as skinny as I was when I had a trainer, but I’m thinner than I was 5 years ago.

I'm still "quirky" and I still have my diabetes food idiosyncrasies. But hell, who doesn't!

Yes, I need to exercise more, and I have to keep reminding myself that low in carb does not equal low in fat.

If I work with a trainer again, it would have to be someone like Ginger. Ginger is positive and she doesn’t yell, she encourages! I just started reading her book, "Your Diabetes Science Experiment" and I’m excited so excited! Review to follow!

It’s a delicate dance we PWDs groove to when it comes to maintaining the perfect balance of insulin, carbs, exercise, and all the diabetes “what ifs” that continually run through our heads and cause us to develop quirks our diabetes quirks.

No matter how hard we try, we are never perfect diabetics.

But diabetes or not, no one is perfect, and diabetes is a tricky little sucker! It’s never the same disease two days in a row.

I’ve found that ceasing to label foods as “BAD” or "GOOD" means that I don’t always want those things that were once strictly forbidden.

There are times when I still find myself asking: Do I dare to eat a peach?

And nine times out of ten, the answer is: YES, a big, fat, delicious one - And I'll bolus accordingly!

Now, if I could just get my shit together when it comes to getting back to exercising on a daily basis, my Brick House status would never be in question!

Weekend

Weekend

Feel the sun on my face and take a long walk in the fresh air

Attempt to get my tax papers in order

Spend time with friends and partake in some bolus worthy meals

Embrace the unexpected

Catch-up on Diabetes blog reading

Write - Because there's so many potential blog posts floating around my brain

Avoid Doorknobs at all costs

Attempt to make Sunday's Aqua Boot Camp

Have at least one meal that involves bacon

Try not to sweat the small stuff, diabetes and otherwise

Keep in mind that it's all small stuff~

The Appointment Before The Endo Appointment

Date: Today - 6 days before my Endo appointment

Time: 7:30 a.m.

Place: Diagnostic Lab

Feeling: Nervous and coffee deprived. I’ve fasted since midnight – And the whole lack of coffee thing is never a good look for me.

I’m about to get my lab work done for my endo appointment that’s 6 days away – and the mind games have begun.

I’m always nervous when I get my labs done. The whole “WHAT IF” factor is a total psychological psych out.

I hate “ WHAT IF” and everything that accompanies it. That phrase does nothing but cause a paralyzing fear and make my blood pressure rise.

I've downed massive quantities of water before I arrived and while I wait, so I can fatten up my veins and my bladder.

Getting my blood drawn is always a bitch because the veins in my arms are almost non-existent and I seriously consider the fact that I might be part vampire. Seriously, Twilight, the movie as nothing on me! After three vials of blood have been taken from my person, it's off to the restroom, where I'm pleasantly surprised to see my refection staring back from the mirror as I enter the restroom with pee cup in hand!

I guess I'm human after all.

I hate peeing in a little cup thingy the size of a small yogurt container and I’m always afraid that:

A. I’ll have lousy aim

B. I won’t be able to pee.

But I do - So I got that going for me.

And then the days of waiting for my lab results and stressing officially begins.

I keep looking at my calendar with dread, like a little kid dreads ripping off a band-Aid.

But I'm a grownup lady, and I need to be all: DAMN THE TORPEDOES & the likes there of.

Next week I will hate walking in my Endo’s office and getting weighed, questioned by an intern & then being left alone in an exam room waiting for my Dr. and the lab news.

How will I explain my results and my diabetes burnout?

But I love my Endo very much - he's great! And I'm grateful that we no longer live in the Diabetes Dark Ages. And I love that I can share my ridiculous case of the D jitters with you guys.

Because even though I'll be going to my Endo appointment alone, I know I’m not alone - And that make me feel all types of warm and fuzzy inside - SO THANKS GUYS!

Diabetes Has........

The post was inspired by a #dsma chat from a few weeks ago: http://diabetessocmed.com/2011/diabetes-fill-in-the-blanks/ So I guess this means it's now part of the #DSMA Blog Carnival!

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Diabetes has made me many things.

Diabetes has made me an insulin whore – except I don’t turn tricks for insulin – but I do pay through the nose to inject myself with this pancreatic elixir of life!

So maybe I’m more of Insulin John – but that doesn’t really have the same ring to it!

Diabetes has made see and appreciate the dark humor of life. Every person I know with diabetes has a strange, wonderfully mccobb, sick and twisted dark sense of the funny – At that’s a great thing!

Diabetes has made me an idiot savant at looking at the food on my plate and gustimating the carb count.

Seriously folks, I can eyeball a cupcake carb count based solely on said cupcakes circumference & icing ratio.

Diabetes has given me a faulty pancreas.

Diabetes has allowed to recognize and experience that little changes = big ones.

Diabetes has made me become a proactive and empowered patient.

Diabetes has turned me into a hoarder of triple AAA batteries, glucose tabs, samples from my endo, test strips, used testing and pumps supplies and all things D related.

Diabetes has allowed friends and loved ones to find me via my Test Strip Trail.

Diabetes made me realize that I was more high tech than I thought possible!

Diabetes has turned my fingers into pincushions and the skin on my abdomen into valuable real estate

Diabetes has made fearless regarding needles and fearful of pasta.

Diabetes has made me worry about the small stuff – And that bullshit’s got to stop, NOW.

Diabetes has made me grateful for the small things in life – And that is a gift that keeps on giving.

Diabetes has made me part cyborg – And I’m not the only member of the Cyborg Clan of D.

Diabetes has allowed me to flip my Diabetes Bitch Switch whenever needed.

Diabetes has taught me to speak in acronyms and diabetes code words like: CWD, PWD, totally bolus worthy, Diaversary, Blood Sugar Nirvana, #bgnow #dsma, - Just to name a few.

Diabetes has made me tough and fragile all rolled into one.

Diabetes has given me a passion and a sense of purpose in my life – And I also owe a big part of my passion & purpose to the DOC.

And diabetes has given me AMAZING FRIENDS, trusted allies, who KICK ASS!!

So my diabetesalicious friends: What has diabetes given you?

My Crowning Glory Ain't So Glorious

OK, here's the thing: Even though it sucks at times having a broken pancreas, I LOVE my insulin and I'm grateful for Doctors Banting & Best's discovery!

And over the years, insulin's side effects haven't been all that bad - At least not bad enough that I've even noticed them that much. I guess when you literally grow up injecting a drug on a daily basis, you become oblivious to the side effects.

But since I started taking two more medications (lowest doses of each), one for blood pressure (ramipril) & one cholesterol (simvastatin), I've realized just how good I've had it with insulin.

I say this, because ever since I've started with the BP and cholesterol meds ........ my hair has started to not look so glorious - To the point I'm seriously considering my options.

I'm at the point now where I'm getting bummed out by the whole situation.

I never had thick hair, I've had what they call FINE hair - But I always had lots and lots and lots of fine hair.

And now my hair mass isn't what it used to be. I mean, it still looks OK, I don't look sparse on top, but the mass/width of my ponytail is NOT what it once was. And like I said - IT'S FREAKING ME OUT.

Side Bar: I'm seeing my Endo next week and am getting thyroid blood work along with my other labs, so I'm not ruling that out as the culprit yet.

As of late I've become obsessed with thickening shampoos and I've started taking Biotin on a daily basis with the hopes that I'll experience some sort of fuller body as far as my crowning glory is concerned.

I never really cursed my genetics re: Type 1 Diabetes. It is what it is, and having lived with it for so long, I've accepted it.

But the whole blood pressure/cholesterol genetics thing and the accompanying side effects of the medications FUCKING SUCK.

I'll admit it, I'M VAIN - And I have no problem coping to it. It's not like I'm a super model or anything - Because I'm obviously NOT. BUT, I always felt that I cleaned up nicely.

Any advice out there on what to do? Have any of you experienced this with your meds, and if so, what did you do about it?

I LOVES YOU!

Oh DOC,

I LOVES YOU

And learn from each and every one of your diabetes points of view.

You rock my world on a daily basis,

And each of you has become a part of my diabetes oasis.

You make me laugh and sometimes cry

And most of the time, we see eye to eye.

You understand the diabetes highs and lows

The continual pricking of fingers, and watching out for stubbed toes.

I love you more than the most bolus worthy of treats

And I always look forward to all of our Diabetes D-Meets!

You came into my world and showed me that I'm not alone

That there are many of us, who sit on D Thrones.

And a special shout out to the parents of CWDs, for always showing me what my parents wouldn't let me see....

And superbly acting as your children's pancreas absentee.

The language of diabetes can be confusing and lonely at times

Diabetes as you know, can turn on a dime.

But knowing that I'm not the only one

Can sometimes make this bad-ass Diazon, come undone.

So thanks for the love, the support, the smiles and the laughs

And thanks for continually kicking diabetes ass!

Diabetesalicious - Lite 2/11/11 "NO MORE SNOW" Edition:

Diabetesalicious - Lite, 2/11/11 "NO MORE SNOW" Edition.

Greetings Diabetesalicious readers and HAPPY FRIDAY! I hope your work week ends on a positive note and your weekend doesn't involve snow or ice!! Can I get a "HELL NO, WE DON'T WANT SNOW" from my Diabetesalicious Congregation!

Speaking of no more snow, this week's Diabetesalicious-Lite is kind of campy - More specifically, Diabetes Camp. I was asked by the fabulous Miss Haley Van Schaick over at NaturallySweet to collaborate on a post with her about the fantasticalness of Diabetes camp. Check out our Diabetes "Camptacular" post, HERE!

Speaking of fantastical, DSMA (Diabetes Social Media Advocacy) is now hosting a monthly DSMA Blog Carnival. What's the carnival all about? Well, (and I'm paraphrasing) a blog carnival is a chance to explore a recent DSMA question in more than 140 characters.
At the beginning of each month, the blog carnival topic will be announced on the DSMA blog. Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to join the carnival by writing a post about the topic of the month on your blog and sharing a link to your entry in the comments section of the DSMA Blog Carnival Post. Once the month has ended, DSMA will present the Blog Carnival Round-Up and feature a few posts that shouldn't’ be missed!

Speaking of rounding up, Kerri over at sixuntilme.com asked the DOC to share their PostSecrets, and the responses are AMAZING. Check out the submissions HERE.

Today is National "Don't Cry Over Spilt Milk" Day. OK, fine - But what about spilt coffee?! Basically, the day is all about not sweating the small stuff!

Today is also White Tee-Shirt Day. So if your going to spill your milk- you'd better be wearing a white tee-shirt!!

Weird facts:
Ancient Egyptians shaved off their eyebrows to mourn the death of their cats - Knowing this fact alone is all the more reason I'm a dog person. I'm totally obsessed with keeping my eyebrows groomed and embracing my inner Juliana Margulies

Four people actually played Darth Vader: David Prowse was his body, James Earl Jones did the voice, Sebastian Shaw was his face and a fourth person did the breathing.

And finally, In 2009, the world’s largest cupcake was built by Ryan Abood from Gourmet Gift Baskets in Manchester, New Hampshire. The cupcake, Ginormous was 1,224 pounds, used 800 eggs and took 12 hours to bake. Talk about BOLUS WORTHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And now you know~