Tuesday, January 20, 2009

An Apology – Numbers – Lunch with DOC friend – And History Being Made…

I feel like I’ve been apologizing to dBlogville as of late and I’m doing it again.

Life’s gotten in the way and I’ve been feeling it. My mom’s surgery is on February 17th and I’m scared. I’ve been going to a crazy amount of Docs appointments with her to get pre surgery clearance. The Vascular surgeons, her cardiac Dr’s, even her Dentist, plus a multiple appointments with her Orthopedic surgeon.

My mom is having a complete Knee replacement – a difficult surgery on the body to say the least, but compound it with her being extremely high risk with her defibulator, pacemaker, and family history of strokes - and I’m kept up at night with the dreaded what-ifs. I smile and stay positive in public - telling my mom (and anyone else) “failure is not an option, and that I wouldn’t make a very good orphan so she has no choice but to come through the operation with flying colors.” But I cry in private, fearing her surgery every day as it draws near. She’s in pain with every step and her quality of life is not what it
was. She needs the surgery- but the High Risk term keeps ringing in my brain.

After losing my father 8 years ago, I realized just how fragile parents are. The past 6 months I’ve been reminded of that lesson again and again.

I’ve also been in the road a lot for work – I’m in Sales and have been on the road at least 3 days a week visiting clients. I’m in my car so much that I’ve contemplated (VERY BRIEFLY) buying a Winnebago. I feel as if I live in my car and have a c
ell phone perpetually growing out of my ear.

As far as my Diabetes work – that’s still going strong – there was a lull during the holidays, but the phone has started ringing again and talks are in the works to getting more gigs on the books.

So with all that is life as of late, by the time I get home, my energy is drained and I just want to sleep.
My blog has suffered – postings have been scant this month and I’m trying to rectify that – I’M SO SORRY. I WILL DO BETTER.

As far as my Diabetes, I had my own Endo appt last week. My numbers were good. I’ve lost 9 lbs since the spring, my A1C was 6.9 (Dr. J thought it would have been lower – closer to 6.6, had I not had the $424 sinus infection) and my blood pressure was textbook.

BUT (and there always seems to be a but,) he wants me to go on Cholesterol medication.
My bad Cholesterol was 120. Not terribly high, but since it’s been fluctuating the past year between 96 and 120 and my family history being what it is, (heart attacks, angioplasty, quadruple bypass surgery) he wants to prevent any and all plac from forming.

I was bummed – I’ve worked really hard to these past two quarters to get my health grooving and I didn’t like hearing that I had to go
on another medication.

“I barely eat meat, & I practically drink Olive oil, I don’t know what else to do.” I said somewhat bitch like.

But Doctor J said something that really stuck: “Kelly, don’t stop eating another thing. You’re doing everything right! This is your genetics speaking
and you need to listen. Your doing great – you just need some help in the Cholesterol. Let’s just try a low dose and see how your numbers are for the next year.”

I felt better and agreed I grabbed my RX (I’d say the name of the medication, but I have a call into his office because I can’t read his RX to tell you the name) and said I’d do it.

Before I said goodbye, Dr. J said snagged 8 bottles o
f insulin for me and said: “I’m so happy with your numbers and I’m going to tell Cheryl (my CDE) when I see her today –she’ll be so excited!” So I made my Diabetes Entourage happy - I got that going for me!

Afterwards, I met LeeAnn from The Butter Compartment for lunch at one of my favorite restaurants in South Philly’s Italian Market. We’d been trying to get together for months and we managed to finally get together - be it last minute on my end. I was so happy to have someone who got the whole diabetes rollercoaster with me that I promptly gave her 2 bottles of my insulin booty when she walked in!

"The Mad Hatter Sisters!"
Lee Ann & I with our lunch leftovers
Photo by Lee Ann Thill - The Butter Compartment

We had a great time! We laughed and talked about anything and everything. The food was fantastic – the conversation even better.

After lunch we went to my favorite Italian bakery, and in my eyes, the Holy Grail of all things delicious and sweet – Isgro’s. The place is a like a Disneyland of baked goods – and yes we indulged! Can you say "BOLUS!"

As for this very moment – I’m doing paperwork (the thorn in every Sales Reps side,) putting the finishing touches on this blog post, I’ve just finished listening to “Air and Simple Gifts” being played with such gusto at the Presidential Inauguration.
Like the today’s events, the music inspires me.

John G. Roberts has just given the oath of office to Barrack H. Obama, and President Obama is now the leader of our county. I’m so happy and proud of the people of the U.S. on so many levels.

President Obama’s speech ignites me to meet the challenges in front of me. “To be a risk taker and a doer,” to work even harder, and “to pick myself up, and dust myself off,” and to be positive in the face of what scares me – which has been so difficult as of late.


Lora said...

I hear you on the cholesterol meds. Been on them for over a year. It's not that my numbers were bad, it's just that given my family's history of heart disease, my endo wanted to add an ounce of prevention. I'm on a low dose and it's keeping everything in the "excellent" range. I hated adding the one more med (especially before it went generic and was super-expensive and not covered by insurance), but if it keeps me from the fate of my very beloved grandmother, who died of a heart attack when I was 17, then I'm willing to swallow one more pill.

Scott K. Johnson said...

Great post K2. We'll be thinking of and pulling for your mom.

I look at the meds as more of a preventative, you know? You're not treating something, you're preventing something. Being aggressive!

Very cool that you and Lee Ann were able to get together! I love meet ups.

k2 said...

I'm all about the ounce of prevention - I guess I just need to bitch. For the longest time my Cholesterol was good, actually great. The fact that this past year it's been on a bit of rollercoaster ride, just reminded me of genetics.
Thanks for understanding!

Scotty J -
Yep - I'm preventing & technology and science is wonderful- that's what I always say to others.
For some reason I thought I'd outsmart genetics- shame on me!
It was great having lunch with Lee Ann! ONe of this days we are having a meetup dude!
Kelly K

Cara said...

Don't worry about not posting. Mine's been spotty at best since November. Just post when you can. We love anything you do.
Also, your mom (and you!) are in my prayers. I get the feeling that you feel about your mom, the way I feel about mine (CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT HER!!!!), so I will be double timing my prayers.
Also, I've been on cholesterol meds for the past couple of years. And at my appointment on Tuesday, my doc took me off! Kind of ironic, huh? But he just did it cause he thinks I'm gonna get pregnant. I told him there's no chance, but he doesn't seem to understand that. So he told me to drink these promise active supershots (little yogurt drinks) every day cause they are supposed to lower your cholesterol by 15%. We'll see how that goes.

Crystal said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your mom.
I wish only the best for her surgery and recovery....your recovery too.

Everytime my mom tells me she has been to the Doctor's my heart skips a beat.

Life is short. Life is precious.

Woo hoo on the A1C. Sorry genetics has a hold on your cholesterol. Preventative is always a good measure. And bitching is always good. ;-)
And, OMG, I should have never left Philly, my Endo has NEVER given me insulin! Coupons but not insulin!!!! I am beyond Envious! No health insurance, no more Lilly Cares Program and nada, I didn't even get a call back from my CDE!!!
Well, more reason to voice my concerns and advocate.

Awesome to have lunch with someone that understands. Great pic!!!

And yeah, Go America. GoBama.

Take care.
And seriously, Don't Apologize.
Life happens. Quickly.
Take care of you so you can be there for your mom.
That is more important than your blog. Do appreciate the update but still, you come first woman.

P.S. Does anyone use that anymore? Any who. Had to share my word verification: pingamb. My initial thought was pinjamb for some reason, in the recesses of my crazy mind there is a reason I thought of it...

George said...

If it makes you feel any better I produced some tears for you and your mom. Parents are precious. I will pray for her and you and especially the surgeons.

Um, could you and Lee Ann look any cuter with your hats? I love hats and you guys ROCK them. So cool.

And the cholesterol thing…. My dad died of a heart attack when he was 43. When my cholesterol was a smidge high and told him I wanted to be on meds. Don’t beat yourself up, genes are what they are. You didn’t do anything.

AND DO NOT STOP EATING BACON! That cannot happen.

k2 said...

Cara -
Thanks for the kind words and prayers my friend.
Yes, I'm stressing about anything and everything as of late - blog included. Keep us posted on how those "Shots" of good Cholesterol works out!

Thanks so much for your positive words and thoughts- I really appreciate them!
P.S - I always use PS - call me nostalgic- but it works, pinjamb or not!

G-Ninja -
No tears, but I will take all the positive thoughts and prayers you can muster up!
I thought LeeAnn and I looked pretty rocking in our hats as well- but reading your thoughts regarding the subject just confirmed it!
And your spot on regarding the meds-and the bacon!

Unknown said...

Hey darlin'. Yeah, I'm wondering if my own endo might put me on a cholesterol med, unless my cholesterol has come down from my last visit. My dad had his first heart attack around 45, but it was never clear to me if that was because of genetics or because of smoking, but HIS dad died from a heart attack, so I am wondering if I'm climbing that genetic ladder toward heart disease. Ugh.

I'll be thinking about you and your mom. Believe it or not, my mom just got scheduled for a knee replacement at the end of March!

Karen said...

First of all, you don't ever need to apologize!!! I am a firm believer that a blog is something you should enjoy - and if you beat yourself up about how often you post, that defeats the purpose. Post when you can - and if life is too busy, we all get it. And we'll be here when you have time! We love you!!!

I can understand your fears over your mom's surgery. Just remember the doctors know what they are doing. And all of us out here are pulling for her.

I hear you on the cholesterol meds. I have those lovely genetics too - doesn't matter what I do, I need to be on the meds. Both my parents are too. I'd choose otherwise if I could, but it's just another card we've been dealt.

Love the picture of you and Lee Ann. So wish I lived closer. For 3 years Pea lived in Moorsetown, NJ so I was down there ALL THE TIME. (Must be close, because it was right outside Philly.) Figures that was before I met you. :(

Big hugs, and e-mail if you need someone to lend an ear!!