Monday, May 20, 2019

Stuff: Blogging, Exercising, May Is National Mental Health Month, CGMing, GoT

Yep, it's been a while since I've posted. 
My excuses: Things have been slightly crazy, I needed to regroup, one week of not blogging quickly turned into multiple and  accompanied by a wicked case of "what the hell do I write about/didn't I already write about that a million times already?! 
Because after blogging for almost 12 years about life with diabetes - sometimes I'm afraid "I've said and or written about that already." But you know what? Everyone who blogs about diabetes feels that way from time to time - and that's OK. 

After taking a short sabbatical - I'm back writing on the blog about my life and my life with diabetes! 

What's New? 
Lots: I've started exercising and thank God because I'm out of practice and I absolutely think better when I'm moving. 

Work has been active - lots of stuff going on and on the horizon  - I am both glad and thankful. 

It's May, which means it's National Mental Health Month. With that being said, I started seeing a therapist in March - because while I was going through the motions of my life, 
I was missing Olivia terribly at the end of the day and I was sad. 
I'm sharing because talking to someone is helping me deal with the trauma of losing my niece Olivia in January - and it's making me stronger in all areas of my life. 
If you're dealing with any form of stress, anxiety, or trauma - including diabetes burnout or grief - go talk to and with a professional.
Seriously - talk with someone - you are worth it! 

Is That  A CGM On Your Arm... Or Are You Just Happy To See Me? 
The answer is BOTH. 
I LOVE seeing you - you look great! And and yeah... I started wearing a CGM (Dexcom G6) in March because my Dr. and I need to make tweaks - I've committed to wearing it for at least 3 months. 
I was supposed to start in January, but Livy passed and I didn't feel like dealing with the learning curve while heading out west for her funeral. February I was bogged with assignments and starting on the Dex was pushed back into March.  

Initial Observations
Graphs have the potential to make you effing crazy!
I believe that people must be trained  on the anxiety that watching your graph can cause. Knowledge is great  - but so is realizing that when you/your loved one eat... or have a cold... are stressed... or just because it's Tuesday, your graph can and will go up. 

Also and I kid you not, we need to step away from the graph after a correction bolus. 
I knew all of the above before wearing a CGM  - and I was still looking at it way to much in the beginning!

CGM alarms are wicked loud.

Compression Low bgs are a thing - As in your CGM Low alarm goes off and reads 59, and you just ate lunch 40 minutes ago and you feel absolutely fine, do a fingerstick check. 
Because Compression Lows (unknowingly pushing against the sensor or sleeping/leaning on it can cause it to read low (at least according to my multiple friends and my CDE,) are real and they happen. Of course I learned about Compression Lows  after treating for said 59 low that really wasn't. HELLO 200! 

On the flip side - I barely felt a 53 low a few days ago that caused my alarm to go off.... at least until I did. It was real and I knew it! 

I'm more mindful of grazing since slapping on a CGM. That's a good thing. 

It's interesting to see how quickly certain foods impact your blood sugar via a graph.
It's equally as interesting and annoying to see how some foods seem to flat arrow for an hour or two and then spike towards the sky for a good three or four hours.
Ahhhh.... Good times..... good times. 

My graph was elevated the week before my period - I always knew this to be true - seeing it on a graph was trippy. 

Watching Game of Thrones absolutely impacts my blood sugars! 
Or at least I'm blaming GoT... and the Show Runners and Writers of GoT.
During last night's finale my bgs were running low. 
The previous weeks, not so much - especially when that ass of a Night King and his army hit Winterfell - I was topping 306 by the time that episode ended! 

Graph during the battle of Winterfell and dinner was not crazy high in carbs.
Also: Changed out my Omnipod site the next day (as in 1 day early,) b/c it was getting skunky.
So yeah, site starting to crap out might have had something to do with my elevated graph.
Whatever, I blame the Night King!

Graph during GoT finale.
I might have over bolused for my big tuna salad.
But the sucky writing certainly didn't help!
Also: Why'd you all demonize Dani and where the hell is my dragon!! 

Speaking of blood sugars - you ABSOLUTELY need to check your blood sugars via finger-sticks while wearing a CGM. 
Certainly not as much .... most of the time. 
My previous sensor required 8 calibration checks in one day before it started syncing - and that required massive amounts of self restraint because I wanted to rip out my sensor and start a new one... but I didn't and being things worked out.
My current sensor was within range on the first (and second) calibration. 
Depending on the day, how my numbers are running, physical activity, and how old my Omnipod site is - my amount of finger-sticks per day varies. 

Bottom line: My pancreas is stone cold busted - I need to make sure whatever robot diabetes part I'm wearing is reading correctly and that requires finger-stick checks~  

So that's all for now. HOW THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? 

Tuesday, March 19, 2019

The Carbs Are In The Details: Slider Specifics

Not a picture of my sliders - but very similar!
The image is from the interwebz
Recently, I went out for much needed Happy Hour with a friend. Cheeseburger sliders were on the menu, I was craving red meat, and I had a few questions for the Server before "officially" placing my order.

1. Were the cheeseburger sliders meaty as opposed to being more bun than meat, or did the meat/bread ratio meet somewhere in the middle? 

2. What was the deal re: the buns? Were they more of a brioche, did they boarder on a potato roll, or are we talking your basic hamburger bun, but shrunk down to slider proportions? 

The waitress was patient and answered my questions with a smile - which the former Server in me greatly appreciated - because I knew my questions were on the finicky side.

She told my that the the sliders meat to bread ratio met almost met in the middle  - with slightly more meat than bun -  and that said slider buns had a brioche feel and texture to them. 

I thanked her, placed my order - 3 cheeseburger sliders, medium, and a glass of the 
House Red. My friend immediately ordered the same and our waitress went off to place our order and retrieve our drinks from the bar.

When the waitress was out of earshot my friend looked at me and said: You asked some detailed questions for a few cheeseburger sliders! 

I grabbed my Omnipod PDM out of my handbag to pre-bolus for my sliders (because buns,) and said with a smile: I’m not picky - at least I don't mean to be. I just needed to know some slider specifics so I can take my insulin accordingly. 

Short Answer: I needed more info so I asked.  

Friend: Ohmygod, that’s right - you did need more info - I’m so sorry, Kel - I completely forgot! 

I told her it was OK - that my diabetes didn’t need a special spotlight, and that much like the devil, the carbs are in the details.  

Then we laughed out loud and started talking about 50 other things - none of them having to do with diabetes. 

FTR: The sliders were delicious; the House Red was damn tasty, my bolus wasn't quote on point, but I figured it out. And most importantly, a wonderful time was had by all! 

Friday, March 8, 2019

International Women's Day: Dear Diabetes Shero Squad

Dear Diabetes Shero Squad - 


All the women impacted with diabetes - those living with diabetes - no matter the type - and those loving a person or persons with diabetes. 

Ladies of the DOC and my diabetes tribe in real life - I’m talking to you! 
Medical professionals and researchers who are fighting for the cure and to make peoples lives with diabetes easier - THIS MEANS YOU. 

Too many women for me to mention individually - you are all my sheroes and I love you something fierce! 

You cheer me on and give me strength - Lifting me up, supporting and carrying me when I need it most. 

You continually inspire; constantly amaze, effortlessly educate, and always make me laugh. 
You all make me feel like I can do anything!

Each of you gives me the courage to fight and the tenacity to continue when I feel like giving up. 

You are magic personified and are Super Heroes in all dimensions  - diabetes and otherwise. 

 Every single one of you is a magnificent gift that continues to give - and I am so damn grateful!

And I love you all.
Kelly K~ 

Thursday, February 14, 2019

Spare A Rose, Save A Child

I've been MIA in the DOC since mid January. I'm back. 
Click HERE to spare a rose, save a child. 
It's Valentine's Day and I have no doubt many are still scrambling for gifts. 
Instead of buying 12 roses, (or cookies 😉,) for someone you love, Spare a Rose, Save a Child, buy 11 roses (or cookies, or whatever,) and donate the cost of one rose ($5) to help deliver life-sustaining insulin and supplies to children who are in desperate need of insulin 
in under-developed countries. 
Over 140k has been raised since #sparearose began in 2013 - hopefully this year that number will be over $180,000. 
And if you don't have a Valentine, no worries - donate in honor of someone you've never met, but who will be thankful for your gift and impact your heart and soul in the process~

If you're able to #SpareARose and donate, please do. 

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

Olivia Ann Kunik - I Will Love & Miss You Forever

My magnificent 19 yearold niece Olivia Kunik left the world on Tuesday, January 8th 2019 and my family is heartbroken.
Olivia was magic - incandescent, bright, funny, talented beyond belief and filled with love  - she was radiant and a ray of sunshine.

We lost her to suicide.

My fantastical niece struggled her whole life with treatment resistant depression and mental illness - and she was always transparent and incredibly candid about her struggles - though when you were around her - you rarely saw her sadness and struggles.

And our Livy helped so many friends, acquaintances and yes, even strangers seek help with their own depression and MH issues.

Depression and mental illnesses are diseases  - very real ones - that have the potential to take the ones we love from us.
Livy loved everyone - sadly, she didn't love herself enough and had difficulty seeing or believing in the magic she possessed.

I'm sharing because I don't want anyone else to suffer from a suicide tragedy.
 Our family is talking about our loss to save lives and to keep Livy's memory alive.
If you or someone you love is struggling, you are not alone and your life is worth living.
Please call 1-800-273-8255
Or text 741741 & someone will respond and reach out.
 Please take a moment  to click on the link below and read about the magic that was our Livvy.

Liv was also a diabetesaliciousness Rock Star back in 2008 - and she stole many hearts in the Diabetes Online Community with her  humor, candor, and wise-beyond-her-years  demeanor and POV. 
Click on the link and read.

In Liv’s memory, do something silly and fun.

Here are some recommendations directly from our Liv: “Perform a random act of kindness, share your favorite meme, make a prank phone call, sing your favorite song, spin until you are dizzy, make music with pots and pans, stomp on grapes in the bathtub, give names to your body parts (Liv’s pinky toe was Lois), cut your hair and regret it later, see how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop, get a pet rock, decorate it, name it Glenn, and take it for a walk.”

Flying out to Colorado tomorrow to celebrate Liv’s life with family, her friends, and an entire hometown that loved her heaps.
I love you so damn much Olivia – and I will love and miss you forever.
Every night I will look up at the stars, looking for your sparkle and listening for your laughter. 

I will talk with and to you every day and write you a long letter very soon - but right now I’m struggling to say goodbye to you my darling baby girl - and I’m struggling to understand why and I cry every day.

I hope you found peace, Liv - I really do.
I'm not there yet and continue to seek peace and understanding as to all the reasons why you are no longer on this earth. 
 #LivForLiv #LivingForLiv

Friday, January 4, 2019

Hello 2019 And How The Hell Is It Already Friday?!

I’m not sharing all my goals for 2019 - at least not right away ;) 
First - HAPPY 2019! 
It’s been a hard week getting back into the swing of things. 
I’m still on holiday time  - meaning I’m still having difficulty getting to bed at a decent time and I’m thoroughly shocked that it’s Friday. Seriously, how the hell did that happen because it feels like freaking Tuesday?  
I can relate. 
image via the interwebz. 
And of course, getting back to normal food and blood sugars - but I’m doing it. 

And instead of New Years resolutions, I have goals. 

For starters - I want to go up a few levels in certain areas of my life and have my a1c go down a few notches. I want to exercise my body and brain more - which means writing more. 
I want to embrace change, doing what I fear first and with gusto.
And like everyone else, drop some pounds (10 lbs by May,) and get back to eating healthy after the holidays. 
The last one has been easy - mostly because I normally eat healthy and I actually really like eating healthy. Also, I’ve reached my wall of Enough, when it comes to big dinners and Christmas cookies multiple times a day. OK, that last part was only the last two weeks of December :)  

I’m craving healthy meals - I’ve been snacking on veggies for the past few weeks and more so than usual. Organic Rainbow Carrots have become a staples in my house for almost a year. 
Also: Give them a try because they are fabulous! 
And I believe the same thing will happen with mini Persian Cucumbers - which have less seeds and more flavor and crunch - also they are hydrating.  Also since November I’ve been digging Green Giant’s riced veggies.
All of the above make it easier to eat healthy - but more on veggies and healthy eating in another post. 

I have mixed feelings about it - being attached to something else - sharing my info with loved ones … or not, embracing something different.  
But my Dr. and I agreed that Dex doesn’t have to be a full time and or permanent thing. 
We need to work on getting my a1c in a better spot and he feels dexcom will help us  troubleshoot. So I'm trying it for 3 months and taking it from there - and I will share my experience with you guys. 

And I will also ask your for advice an support because you guys ROCK - so thanks in advance!

Monday, December 31, 2018

My Hopes For Us In 2019

Free 2019 image via VectorStock
My Hopes For Us In 2019 
Lots of happiness and health - which of course is a given - and boatloads of tenacity to boot!
The ability and strength to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and get back up whenever we fall - and the doggedness to try again until we succeed. 
Having more things to laugh out loud about and less things to cry about when it comes to our lives and our lives with diabetes. 

To continue becoming the person we truly are and were always meant to be - before self doubt crept in and veered us off path - and super power navigation skills accompanied by strong winds for our sails, to get us back on course. 
Strong inner strength to plow through all the crap that gets in our way on our path to becoming that person.
Being more successful than we were the previous year - and in all dimensions, while helping others to do the same. 
Having the strength to continue advocating for diabetes (and anything and everything else we are passionate about,) and to be the change that we wish to see. 
The ability to turn our self doubts into tools of self empowerment. 
Taking the lead with our diabetes more often than our diabetes takes the lead with us. 
To say yes to the things we fear and wish for!
For each of us to continue to grow and learn from our mistakes, while being grateful for the lessons learned. 
Politicians who grow spines and stop acting like spoiled brats - enough is enough and we deserve better! 
No pre-existing conditions clauses and health care insurance caps - EVER.
An end to sky rocketing health insurance costs including medications!

Speaking of life saving medications, lower insulin prices and #insullin4all become the reality and the norm in 2019, because people in the United States and around the globe shouldn’t have to die because they can’t afford insulin.