Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Way Back Wednesday: Summoning The Diabetes Gods

I originally wrote the following post way back on 5/4/2011, a lot has changed in my life since then, but not my affinity for calling out to the Diabetes Gods whenever I need them.

Hope you can relate to the following and I hope it makes you smile!
I'm not religious, but I am highly spiritual & highly spirited - Just ask the people at Readers Digest "The Bible Cure for Diabetes" shmuck who thought prayer was the way to cure diabetes!

I was raised Catholic by a Protestant mother and a Catholic father who later found out that there was more than a very good chance that he was part Jewish on his father's side.
I take a little bit from all the religions and try my best to be a good person. 

I believe in praying and I believe in giving thanks. 

Personally, I think the Dali Lama is a wise man, and I love that he wants people to focus on their similarities, not their differences. Regardless of whether or not their differences involve religion, politics, or the age old Mets vs Yankees fans conundrum! 

I find religion in songs like "Bridge Over Troubled Water," "Let It Be," and "Private Universe."
I feel religion in nature - the ocean takes my breath away and flowers make me happy,
and I find the congregation I feel most at home in is The Church Of Helping Others. 

But every now in then I call on "The Diabetes Gods," especially when my numbers or wonky or I'm contemplating pasta. And just so we're clear, I'm not calling them to cure or fix my diabetes. I'm calling on them purely for entertainment.~

These deities only exist in my imagination of course, but they help me smile just the same.
The make me laugh, which helps me to cope & get on with the business of getting on with my life.

Summoning the Diabetes Gods goes something like this:

Goddess of the Bolus & Basal Rates, PLEASE help me figure out this lasagna in all it's cheesy glory!

God of the everlasting Insulin Pump Battery - Please don't let my battery crap out before I get home!

Most times I'm more generic re: which Diabetes God I'm referring to and include them all by say something along the lines of: Hey Diabetes Gods, PLEASE stop my numbers from going all batshit and help my correction bolus to get my blood sugars back in normal range! 

OR: Hey Diabetes Gods, I'm making a ceremonial offering to you in the form of a Crumbs Bake Shop cupcake - Hope you'll be pleased with both the cupcake and my bolus to cover said cupcake! 
Sidebar: This one is a personal favorite! 

What can I say, I also find my religion in humor, and damn if calling on the Diabetes Gods every now and then doesn't make me LOL as I'm figuring out my diabetes math, bolus and or temporary basal rate!

And before people get all judgmental on me, I also pray to the God of found Parking SpacesThe Goddess of 5 lbs lostThe Rocket Surgeon God and the God Of The Good Tailor!

1 comment:

Rick Phillips said...

When I say those things, I substitute Sheryl for the word God. Everybody needs a Sheryl.